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« World Economic Forum, January '06 | Main | Quick Links: Public Service Announcement Edition » July 18, 2006
My Random Commuter Observations
Posted by Bill Robbo the Llamabutcher's complaining about the brutal heat, exquisitely suffered during this summer's ozone-choked morning commute into downtown DC. Terrible, isn't it? And one would hope - as a slight upside - that the sun's merciless forge would at least drive the tourists away, singeing them back to their jabbering nests in North Nebraskohio like midwestern-accented vampires bedecked in Ray-Ban knock-offs and nylon fanny packs. "Ooh miy gead. Sooh hat riyght naao." Or even better, flash-melt them into flesh and floursecent-colored puddles that inflict no more inconvenience than a stickily iridescent film on the bottom of one's shoes. But no. They're still here. Jostling, babbling, retina-scalding traffic cones getting in my f*&^%$@ way as a starched collar fuses to the back of my neck during the morning Metro rugby scrum. This may be Hell. Posted by Bill at July 18, 2006 09:37 AM | TrackBack (4) Trackback PingsTrackBack URL for this entry: CommentsIt's all part of a plot against you, specifically, Bill. And dorkafork is the head honcho. Posted by: rbj at July 18, 2006 10:19 AM Given that it's a secret plot, how do YOU know about it? Wait a ... Posted by: Bill from INDC at July 18, 2006 10:26 AM Tourons........brillant post. if your in hell you have so many of us with you. there is nothing worse than DC in the summer. Posted by: Kat at July 18, 2006 10:28 AM Bill, Guess that's the price of working in the seat of national power... You don't think the Founding Fathers located the nation's capitol in a (then) malarial swamp by accident, do you? Out Here Posted by: Rodney Graves at July 18, 2006 11:42 AM I feel a summer vacation coming on... Now that I know Bill's weakness I feel a need to exploit it somehow. Where specifically do you do your commuting? Nothing quite like metro stations in the summer. Posted by: Scoob Speaking of plots, how is it that you actually stoop to link me and the next thing I know Moo Knew is on the fritz again! Damn you, Bill! Posted by: Robert the Llama Butcher at July 18, 2006 01:54 PM Made Bill paranoid, and brought down Moo Knew. My work here is done for the day. Muwahahahahahahack, coff, coff, wheeze. Posted by: rbj at July 18, 2006 02:33 PM I had to wait almost 20 seconds at a stoplight today. That practically doubled my commute! Traffic is brutal out here in the Midwest. Posted by: TallDave at July 18, 2006 04:12 PM As someone who resides by choice in a state that both begins and ends in a vowel: Bite me. Thank you, and feel free to return to your life of glorious self-absorption/importance. Posted by: Pat Rand at July 18, 2006 04:16 PM Oh, I'm not important. I just want you to stand to the right on the escalator. Posted by: Bill from INDC at July 18, 2006 05:02 PM Fought Super Bowl, All-Star game, political convention AND tourist traffic. Take a number and stand, that seat is taken. Posted by: Bill M at July 18, 2006 05:33 PM Sorry to dash your hopes, Bill, but it's been just as hot in Nebraska so you're stuck with them. The weather's not going to help in any event. I mean, once we get out of Nebraska it takes a lot more than crap weather to make us go back. Posted by: SeanH at July 18, 2006 07:11 PM What? DC confiscates billions of the peoples' money to build a Metro and then bitches about commuting? Next time let us buy you a Big Dig. Posted by: Lars at July 18, 2006 07:28 PM What? DC confiscates billions of the peoples' money to build a Metro and then bitches about commuting? DC is a federal enclave. Don't like the way DC spends money? Write your Congressman; we don't have any. Posted by: harrison at July 18, 2006 08:55 PM Bill: My sympathies. When one lives in the Midwest one must deal with heat - humid heat no less - but rarely must one suffer tourists. How vexing your summer must be. Paul Posted by: Conserve Liberty at July 18, 2006 08:56 PM Bill - I always park my pasty-white, corpulent, midwestern carcass to the right on the escalator...with my bags to my left. You sound just like a farmer...always bitching about the weather and the tourists. Posted by: Pat Rand at July 19, 2006 08:03 AM harrison - ummm...you "don't have any" congressman? Is that because you have a congresswoman? Seems to me that the lovely Eleanor Holmes Norton collects a salary to be your Representative. Or are you just bitching because the Constitution doesn't allow her to vote? So, with no voting member in Congress it seems to me that all YOUR paycheck are belong to US. Mwaahaahahaha! Posted by: Pat Rand at July 19, 2006 08:20 AM Used to live in that shitehole DC, then decided to move to a real town called Chicago. Chicago's not a contrived tax dollar sinkhole like the Great Dismal, and our crooked politicians actually get things accomplished. We get tourists too, but we're happy to have them here- something about being friendly....course if memory serves, the people in DC don't know much about that- too busy being self important overgrown student gov't geeks. Posted by: 2BrixShy at July 19, 2006 08:36 PM .course if memory serves, the people in DC don't know much about that- too busy being self important overgrown student gov't geeks. Sounds about right. Posted by: Bill from INDC at July 19, 2006 08:57 PM Add one more ozone depleting vehicle to your equation Bill....I'll be there, yet again....tomorrow afternoon. But I’m there often enough that even I find myself cursing the jostling babblers in front of me trying to figure out how to work the automated metro card machine. God forbid I’m behind one that slides their paper ticket in upside down again and again and again and again…until they try a different slot to no avail. Bastards.
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