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November 18, 2005
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Posted by Bill

*** Do you know what today is?

Why, today's the return of the Dark Lord, it is:

As good as these actors are, nothing prepares you for the malevolent force that is Lord Voldemort and the brilliance of the actor playing him, Ralph Fiennes. Dressed in a flowing black robe that seems to float off his body rather than hang, Mr. Fiennes moves with lissome grace, his smooth white head bobbing like a cork on a sea, his fluttery hands and feet as pale and bright as beacons. For years, the movies have tried to transform this delicate beauty into a heartthrob, but as "Schindler's List" proved, Mr. Fiennes is an actor for whom a walk on the darker side is not just a pleasure, but liberation. His Voldemort may be the greatest screen performance ever delivered without the benefit of a nose; certainly it's a performance of sublime villainy.

Absinthe-swilling Canadian dandy Ghost of a Flea has compiled a wide array of Goblet of Fire release-related links to dark mark this glorious occasion.


*** Are academics being denied tenure because of their blogs? Probably:

Hundreds, perhaps thousands, of academics keep blogs these days, posting everything from family pictures to scholarly works-in-progress. While few are counting on their Web publications to improve their chances at tenure, many have begun to fear that their blogs might actually harm their prospects. Last July, "Bloggers Need Not Apply," an essay in the Chronicle of Higher Education about an anonymous Midwestern college's attempt to fill a position, laid out the perils for academic job-seekers who blog. "Our blogger applicants came off reasonably well at the initial interview, but once we hung up the phone and called up their blogs, we got to know 'the real them'—better than we wanted, enough to conclude we didn't want to know more," wrote the pseudonymous columnist.

One thing I'm certain of: my future political ambitions died a shrieking, scrabbling, muddy death the minute I allowed Hubris and Dorkafork to start posting here. As well as any future employment prospects, come to think of it. As a matter of fact, it's probably safe to say that my new blogging manservants are wholly responsible for destroying my credibility and reputation, both as a serious CITIZEN JOURNALIST, as well as personally, since every human interaction endeavored in meat space is now preemptively tainted by the fetid albatross of Hubris and Dorkafork's concordantly hungry and repellant online perversions. Their appetites garotte me with resilient shame.

I am ruined.

...

Well. That's a load off.

Who's up for some Harry Potter?!

Posted by Bill at November 18, 2005 08:01 AM | TrackBack (2)

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Comments

Hell, I have nothing to worry about. I never make it past the phone interview anyway...

Posted by: Sharp as a Marble at November 18, 2005 09:48 AM

"As a matter of fact, it's probably safe to say that my new blogging manservants are wholly responsible for destroying my credibility and reputation,..."

And it's been painful to watch.
(I get these stiches in my sides when I laugh.)

Posted by: harrison at November 18, 2005 09:59 AM

Anonymous academics will sneer at blogs precisely as long for it takes for them to decide they invented blogs in the first place. In fact, blogging was anticipated by the Grundrisse or something.

Posted by: Ghost of a flea at November 18, 2005 10:11 AM

Bill, don't be mad at me just because I accidentally stepped on your Harry Potter Magical 3-D Carousel.

This might help: Dumbledore would advise you to forgive me.

Posted by: Hubris at November 18, 2005 10:17 AM

Dumbledore died along with hope.

Posted by: Bill from INDC at November 18, 2005 10:19 AM

The new Snape movie is out! Woot!

Posted by: Donnah at November 18, 2005 10:24 AM

Bill don't worry, life isn't over it's just taken a sharp turn. Instead of becoming the next political savior you will live out your days with Hubris and Dorkafork sitting in the corner of your apartment mutturing about the "good ol' days when you took down D.R." while Donna Summer plays in the distance.

A toss up I'd say.

Posted by: Chris at November 18, 2005 10:32 AM

I do like me some Donna Summer.

Posted by: Bill from INDC at November 18, 2005 10:35 AM

Bill,
If it makes you feel any better, I lost all respect for you long before Hubris and Dorkafork showed up. In fact, it occured about the time those rumors about your rather odd relationship with Goldstein's armadillo began to appear in the NYT and WaPo.

Posted by: Lew Clark at November 18, 2005 12:14 PM

Blogging by untenured professors or graduate students is potentially a threat to their careers. If any academic bloggers express conservative, pro-war, or depending on the political norm, even moderate viewpoints, they will envoke a hostile response from their peers. The same sort of censure takes place in everyday conversations, so why would blogging be allowed liberties?

Posted by: Mirra at November 18, 2005 08:56 PM

Yeah, "I run Dorkafork's Cavalcade of Crap" is front and center on my resume.

It's funny, I had been meaning to change my Internet name for a while now. At least I have the satisfaction of knowing it has helped ruin your employability. (Hubris has a cool "WWII secret code name"-esqe nick.)

Posted by: dorkafork at November 19, 2005 01:43 AM

I can only hope that my future posts can reach the high standards set by this classic piece of Bill journalistic excellence.

Posted by: dorkafork at November 19, 2005 01:57 AM

That post was educational, and stuff.

Posted by: Bill from INDC at November 19, 2005 08:08 AM

(Hubris has a cool "WWII secret code name"-esqe nick.)

Oh man, you're the first to figure me out--I'm actually an eighty-five year old Navajo "Windtalker."

Busted!

Posted by: Hubris at November 19, 2005 09:38 AM

I live at 77466 Commonwealth in Seattle. Been up here before?

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