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November 13, 2005
My Dead-Bang Case Proving That Chris Simms Is An Illegitimate Bastard

Posted by Hubris

simms.jpg
1) Their faces don't look alike. At all.

2) Chris Simms has never been a color analyst for an NFL broadcast.

3) Both of them have played football at the professional level, but one played for the Giants and the other plays for the Buccaneers.

4) Phil Simms was just an albino, while Chris Simms is a super-albino.

Phil, sorry about the cuckold thing; someone had to tell you.

UPDATE: In the comments, Chris points to a possible Busey connection.

Posted by Hubris at November 13, 2005 09:38 PM | TrackBack (6)

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Comments

Dave has a theory that Chris Sims is really Jake Busey, which would make his father...

...Gary Busey!

Posted by: Chris of Dangerous Logic at November 14, 2005 07:43 AM

Thanks for the link!

And yes, be afraid of the Simms-spawn. Be VERY afraid.

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