After I calmed down from the excitement of spotting the young Desmodus lunarius nihilista, I began to hear something that resembled music ... acoustic guitar, yes, it was a Macroglossius lunarius commonus folk dancing ritual, about to take place before my very eyes! Let's have a listen:

Surrounded by an army
There for their defense
Armed with APC's and copters
And lots of common sense

Behind a fence
Behind a wall
That shout just shall not pass
Broken shells, plastic bullets
And a thousand gallons of tear gas!

(Guitar solo)

World leaders kept on talkin’
Behind the moat up on the hill
And they boasted of prosperity
And their elitist free trade bill.

And they thanked God, they thanked Boeing,
They thanked the World Bank
They thanked the firepower, of the M-1 tank.

They defended their positions
And the glory of their claaaaaasssss
With broken skulls, plastic bullets
And a thousand gallons of tear gaaaaaaas!

Struck by the catchy nature of the tune, and filled with a sudden and powerful urge to dance, I hastily decided that it was time to move on.

A common misperception about moonbats is the belief that they are godless creatures. As is evidenced by these intricately crafted paper mache totems, that is not necessarily the case. The blue fellow on the left is the one called Naed Drawoh, the "Destroyer," or "Devourer of Worlds," considered the patriarch of the New Gods by various moonbat species. The lady in green is Y'Rallih, the "Matron Goddess of the Village."

According to legend, Naed Drawoh defied the higher pantheon of Old Gods in a brave bid to save humankind from the yoke of eternal servitude. In a last desperate battle he uttered a final ear-splitting war cry and promised to lead the faithful to victory across the land, but in the end was betrayed and cast out of the higher planes by the Ancient Ones. Moonbats believe that he bides his time until Ragnarok, or the "final reckoning," when the faithful will be called to revolution on the middle plane of Earth.

Y'Rallih is a much more complex figure. Often called the "Cunning One," or "She of Thick Ankles," she is feared as well as respected. It is believed that she bides her time among the Ancient Gods, waiting for her opportune moment to seize ultimate power. Moonbats have a love-hate relationship with Y'Rallih, but they generally assume to unite behind her once she ushers in the period of Nochtenveer, or "the thousand years of darkness."

While not necessary in the context of the current, massive swarm, when searching for more isolated gatherings of moonbats, it's helpful to remember that they are typically drawn towards stagnant pools of filthy water.

Ah, here we see a local District favorite, a pack of migrating Western Warblar Moonbats practicing the art of Luna-Kuchipodi, or traditional rhythmic dance. I've tagged this pack before, and each has a name and ID transmitter that enables us to keep track of their health status and whereabouts. They look strapping and beautiful!

Let's listen in on their chant:

Side-step
Booty-shake
Clap! Clap!
(Whipping noise/motion)

Side-step
Booty-shake
Clap! Clap!

Our weapon of choice is not a gun
Our words are power
And toys are fun
Use your hands for somethin' better
Everyone get off together!

The pack then moaned and groaned loudly, dissolved into a seething pile and engaged in simulated sex acts. Amazing.

Macroglossius lunarius narisplanus boarerus in full-throated yowl.

Here we have a great shot of CheeChi, perhaps one of the most beautiful and interesting specimens I've discovered to date. CheeChi is remarkable because he isn't actually a Western Warbler, rather a Flat-billed Howler Moonbat that was crippled and orphaned by trigger-happy game wardens in Seattle and taken in by the group. This welcoming behavior really speaks volumes about the open and familial nature of these highly gregarious creatures. CheeChi hoarsely sings several octaves lower than his compatriots, and dances with a limp, but they gladly accept him as one of their own.

Here we have a great sequence of our girl Luna, performing a ritual attack simulation. If she was legitimately threatened and performing the strike in earnest, it would be accompanied by a howling shriek and the simultaneous discharge of various bodily fluids.

Here we have DeeDee on the left and Pinky on the right. Mistaking me for one of her own, Pinky is giving me her best "come hither" mating stare, while DeeDee blindly sways on. DeeDee suffers from a condition called Chiba Retinopathy, a highly common moonbat disease acquired from exposure to caustic fumes from something called the "sticky-icky." Repeated smoke exposure dries and kills the blood vessels in the eyes, and the the body compensates by overgrowing back a mass of new blood vessels that serve to cloud and dim the moonbat's vision and render them highly sensitive to light. Fortunately, the communal nature of the warblers guarantees this girl's continued survival.

Here we catch two Macroglossius lunarius gothikas indulging in a bit of the aforementioned "sticky-icky." The dazed yet friendly look in this boy's eyes indicates that he has also probably gone "wet" in an attempt to embark on a "dream quest." Good luck, little fellow.

Another District regular that INDC readers will recognize ...

This is where the expertise of a professional becomes essential, as we spot several full-grown specimens of Desmodus lunarius nihilista arboles, or the Dreaded Killer Anarchist Tree-bat. A close relative of its ground-dwelling cousin, it is imperative that one stays far away from these aggressive beasts. Unwary humans and benign moonbats step under their perch at great peril, as the the Tree-bat is known to toss feces, firebombs, or just leap downwards and pounce on its prey. Highly dangerous, highly unpredictable, stay away!

Here we see a full-grown example of the ground-dwelling Desmodus lunarius nihilista. This tragedy was not caught on film, but immediately after this picture was taken, the young buck turned and charged my position, and I was forced to dispatch him with several well-placed Hydro Shock rounds. Tragic, but a necessary risk to entertain when attempting close interaction with these wild and unpredictable creatures.

Herding game wardens keep their mounts some distance from the swarm, as the horses are known to stampede when exposed to the overwhelming scent of patchouli, and some moonbat species are spooked by close proximity to the four-legged beasts.

The migration begins! Horns blaring, beating drums and throaty shouts marked the call to march!

I inserted myself amongst the masses to get the best possible shots. Their twittering excitement was palpable!

There are at least eight species of moonbats in this frame alone. Can you identify them?

This fellow got a bit nervous as he spied me mixing with the swarm, but took no aggressive action.

Some Ancient Mini's proudly declared their allegiances and tried to keep pace with the younger members of the swarm. Unfortunately, mere minutes after this picture was taken, the Minis were trampled to death and partially eaten by a pack of rampaging nihilstas. In the midst of this sad yet natural event, I could hear the minis shouting. "Kofi, help us! Heeeeelp us!"

A beautiful specimen of Macroglossius lunarius afrikanusbadcreditus.

I followed the swarm through the canyons of glass, and to my surprise, there were no mass disruptions or serious attacks carried out by the more aggressive species. Other than a few random aggressors that needed to be captured or put-down, it seems that the pre-installed cages and heavily-armed game wardens enabled this to be a safe, healthy season.

Game wardens tag a nihilista. (Courtesy of Severnriver)

Several of the moonbats began to get a little nervous as they massed near the IMF, and not wanting to push my luck, I decided to call it a day. We'd seen a fantastic variety of species, witnessed various religious and social rituals and iconography, had a rare sighting of an immature nihilista and only had to dispatch one rabid adult. All-in-all, a fascinating and successful expedition.

I hope you've enjoyed INDC's coverage!

For the curious, a few moonbat FAQ's can be found here. Further inquiries are more than welcome.

And if you've missed our previous efforts, be sure and take a moment to peruse some past INDC coverage:

INDC Science Series: Seasonal Moonbat IMF Migration, Part One

INDC Rally: Into the Gates of Mordor and John Kerry's Pro-Choice Party

INDC Protests: Moonbattery and Media Chicanery Outside the Supreme Court

INDC Protests: International Answer Protests in DC

INDC Protests: ANSWER, MASSF and Jews United Against Zionism

Wardens Baker and Poncherello reflect on a job well done!